Kind people and sweets.

I saw her in the back door of the store, she was going outside and I just followed her without considering my actions could appear threatening to a young woman all alone.

I stopped myself right in the door and I saw her lying down against the wall while looking to the street that was under the bridge, she was about to smoke. As soon as she tried she choked, whether it was her first time or she was having a bad smoking day.

- Are you alright? I said while getting close to her and she just throws a really threatening look at me... I stopped right away, preventing myself from getting any closer. I wonder if she noticed it herself and if she actually meant to, or if I was being oversensitive since I've been wanting to approach her for a long time.

- I am fine, thanks. She said and that look disappeared from her face immediately while she took her hand to her breast like recovering her breath and checking on her own heart's rhythm.

- Sorry. I said without even thinking. I just wanted to help. I said in an apologetic tone and I guess she noticed because she smiled shyly at me and my heartbeat sped up.

- It's alright. It's just my first-time smo... trying to smoke, and it didn't actually work. So I was right about the first option, it's her first time. 

- I am sorry. I said again asking myself why was I apologizing so much.

- It's not your fault that this tastes so bad, nor the fact that it smells terrible... It's not even your fault the reason why I am doing it. She said getting really down and looking at the floor. My heartbeat slowed down as her voice did with each word.

- Why did you do it? I asked her without taking my eyes away from her and I wonder who was this woman, turning me into a completely unknown version of myself.

- You're quite direct, aren't you? Also curious. She said and giggled. I was just happy to be able to get that from her, as small as it was, as perfect as it seemed to me. I am just trying to cope with the pain. Some people recommended me drugs and alcohol; honestly, I held in for a long time and finally decided to give it a try. Alcohol wouldn't work, I am not even able to drink half a glass actually and it tastes horrible so I have no idea about how people even do it. I thought maybe smoking would make it, but I couldn't have been more wrong... She said and a tear rolled over her cheek. Oh, so sorry. She said while cleaning it.

- I am sorry I touched such a topic carelessly. I said in an attempt to come back to my real self and be more connected with her emotions instead than mine.

- Imagine if talking about vices is a "delicate topic", nobody would bring it up always so normally. It's not your fault again... It's me, I am trying to handle my own poisons. I am stuck with the worst one that by attacking my heart has found a way to spread out all over my being. I put the dagger in my breast, not you; there's nothing to be forgiven for. She said and I was nearly speechless.

- Are you a writer? I asked astonished. And she looked at me hesitantly.

- Would that diminish the importance of my words? She asked with a cunning tone.

- Then you are a writer. I said and looked somewhere else not wanting to fall again for the natural charm she laughed for real this time, and my heart betrayed me one more time, of course.

- How unfair! She said and I felt incredibly proud to be able to change her mood... I felt glorious for making her happy while wondering if I could give myself the credit for real. Still, that wasn't unfair, unfair was her being so charming and shaking my heart in such a way constantly.

- You should've warned me you speak so nicely so that I won't get shocked by your words and think what a deep soul you have! I said jokingly and we laughed together.

- I have a deep soul, despite the fact of me being a wri... I write, I don't know if I can call myself a writer though. Anyways, those were my honest thoughts and feelings. She said seriously. Thanks for the nice conversation, you've made it more bearable today. I guess I don't really need drugs and so, I'll stick to kind people and sweets. She said smiling now and while I was trying to recover my breath, she left. And I wonder if she left all alone as I found her or with my heart among her hands.